Musings of an Entrenched 4th Year Veterinary Student

By: Misha Neumann

University of Illinois, Class of 2011

• For me, the 1^st day of a rotation, is the worst. I tend to have the unfortunate luck of staying well after hours and get the emergencies
• Why oh why do I always get the crazies? (both animals and owners)
• It’s really hard to talk to an attractive client face-to-face without sounding like a total idiot
• Why am I required to wear nice professional clothes when I just put a dumpy labcoat over them?
• It never fails that as soon as I hand-bleach the heck out of my labcoat, I get it mucked up, due to no fault of my own
• There isn’t a day that goes by where I almost walk out the door and never look back
• It only takes a sweet animal or an appreciative word to make it all worth it.
• I admit it.  I’ve dance in the Equine wards at 3am with my hoodie up and my iPod blastin’.
• I am very thankful that I am not one of the unlucky souls who have found poop in my pocket.
• I don’t care how beautiful the sunrise is at that time, 5am is too early to be driving to the hospital.
• My glasses still fog with anti-fog masks. I try to wear contacts on surgery days just for that reason
• One of the weirdest dreams I’ve had involved bellydancing and chickens.  Why me?
• Fourth year clinics are one of the few times where you can feel like crying all the time and it’s normal.  Oh, and don’t forget the feeling of jubilation and victory one moment, and utter devastation the next.  Boy, I could not imagine being pregnant being on clinics!
• I wonder if I’ll be able to eat a meal in over 5 minutes after this…
• I pack my lunches for the week every Sunday.
• Fluffer Nutters are the staples of my existence.
• I feel like I am in high school again, only instead of bringing a gym bag and band uniform to school, I bring scrubs and professional attire.
• The days when I forget to put a watch on are REALLY frustrating
• I don’t even put the thermometer back in its case anymore.  It’s just too cumbersome.  I clean and shove it in the pocket and go.
• I’m really paranoid about not having a pen, so I hoard them…and curse when they fall out of my pocket as I bend over.  Aka pocket vomit.
• Sharpies need to write better on syringes…and you might as well throw in the towel if you get a drop of water on the thing you’re labeling.
• Believe it or not, clinicians are human after all
• I appreciate fresh air and light so much more now and sometimes sneak outside just to feel the sun on my face, no matter how cold and windy it is!
• If I didn’t lay out my clothes the night before, I’d have a panic attack in the morning.
• Getting bone dust/chips in your eye is no picnic.
• I hate that I compare myself to everyone around me.
• I had a client that thanked me profusely just for checking in on his dog after major surgery, telling him that the dog responded to its name, and I still don’t get why something so simple deserves so much praise.
• Clients seem to love me, even when clinicians don’t.
• I’ve eaten ice cream for breakfast because I had no bread for toast and no milk for cereal.
• I’m surprised surgeons don’t have urinary catheters with some of hours they pull.
• Sitting down for 5 minutes is a luxury and utterly heavenly.
• Thank you Dr. Scholl’s.
• I wish I had a pedometer so I could see just how much ground I cover in a day.
• As I was running to my first in-house emergency, surrounded by others dressed in labcoats and scrubs, I felt like I was on some television medical drama.  Eat your heart out House, Scrubs, and Grey’s Anatomy!
• My 1^st code was terrifying.
• Give me animal bodily fluids over babies any day, yech!
• Fourth year is Limbo.  I feel so smart compared to the general populace, but a total nincompoop amongst those in my profession (including my fellow 4^th years).
• Dating is a foreign concept to me now.  I tend to look at people as if they are from Mars when they ask me if I’ve met anyone.  Seriously people, I am married to the vet school!
• I feel as if I am two completely different people: the vet student and the 20-something human being.
• Just where do all those bumps, bruises, and scratches come from?
• I can’t tell you many times I’ve hit my head on a cage door.
• Why do some residents feel the need to launch tissues and fluids at students during surgery?
• No one should be forced to work 18 days straight.
• I have no real concept of time, only that it is passing, and even that awareness doesn’t come to consciousness often.  It doesn’t have time to, hah!
• I firmly believe every soap dispenser should have a bottle of hand lotion next to it. Am I becoming part alligator?
• I hate being part of the gossip machine, but I find it necessary to contribute for rotation mate bonding purposes.
• It really burns me when a clinician tells me something’s “not rocket science.”  You may have been doing this gig for years now, but it’s all relatively new to me, so lay off will ya?  Remember when you were in my shoes?